Last night a little one hopped on to my bed as I took a late-night meeting. She waited patiently because she needed to talk with me. Quietly she whispered that her heart was hurting and that she needed my help. I nodded, tucked her in close, and continued my call, every so often tucking a stray piece of hair behind her ear.
When the call was finished, I gave my attention to her and listened as she shared an interaction she’d had with some children. Words had been used that just aren’t used in our home, and she was upset by it. Her sensitive heart is a treasure but needs a tender touch.
In some ways, I am grateful for these glimpses of the reality of the world we are living in right now. It pains me but I am reminded of the importance of having one foot in Heaven and one foot on Earth to be that witness of love without judgement. Being a mother who believes firmly that every moment is a teachable moment, either with words or by example, I gathered my thoughts for a lesson.
Helping our children navigate life in this fallen world
Realizing that we live in a fallen world and that everyone has different standards, I first took out my devotional. That morning I had read about putting on a shield of faith. We talked about what shields can do, how they can protect us. Shields also have an emblem on them or a coat of arms defining who the user serves. A shield of faith can protect us from the attacks of the world against our identity as Christians. But first we must place some flags in the sand to mark where we stand.
I asked my little one if she had set her standards. She knew our family’s standards, but had she set her own? How do we decide the who and what we allow into our lives? What were her absolutes? What do we do when something makes us uncomfortable? If someone is speaking poorly of someone? Is that a “stop” sign or a “proceed with caution”? What about bullying, language, and impurity?
We must be prepared to be met with these foes and have a ready response. I think we need to teach these lessons from an early age and revisit and reinforce them as our children are growing.
Parenting inspiration from Scripture
When they are young, I love these verses from Saint Paul’s Letter to the Philippians:
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is gracious, if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. Keep on doing what you have learned and received and heard and seen in me. Then the God of peace will be with you. (Philippians 4:8-9)
It is good to keep our focus on these things, to seek them in ourselves and in others.
It is in the Letter to the Ephesians where we hear Saint Paul remind us:
In all circumstances, hold faith as a shield, to quench all [the] flaming arrows of the evil one. (Ephesians 6:16)
And oh, can he throw arrows! My days are filled with arrows of temptation to sway from the task at hand. I am easily distracted. I can be short fused. I am often tired. The negative self-talk and the judgement of others to validate my own actions all seek to separate me from the peace and love that Christ is constantly offering.
I love parenting. I love the sanctity it offers. I love the parallels and reminders it gives me for my own life as I am reminded to revisit the very things that I am teaching my children. Where am I placing my stop signs of life? Do they need to be moved? Closer? Further? How am I coping with the flaming arrows being shot my way? Do I allow worry and stress to steal my joy or do I stand firm in the knowledge of who I am and Whose I am?
Teaching my children to use the shield of faith
The lesson I am teaching my daughter is to use that shield of faith given to her at her Baptism, fortified by the sacraments, to guard her heart. Pray for those who throw arrows. Stand firm in what you know is good, true, beautiful, and pure, but also form for yourself a heart of compassion and let the light of Christ within you shine so that others will be drawn to the heart of Jesus through you.
This article also appeared at CatholicMom.com
